CHRISTMAS at the SEA

The digital clock of my phone ticked 11:59. One minute away from Christmas. I woke up feeling dizzy. I looked around and saw a scene like the portrait of the mother and child deeply asleep in their double-deck bed. I felt the biting cold so I wore my red and black coat, went outside, and looked far at the placid blue sea. It’s Christmas!

A day before, I woke up at 4:30am, to catch up the 5:15am air con bus going to Dumaguete. I wasn’t lucky enough though. When I arrived, all seats were taken. Some were already on their feet with their one hand on the railings. The trip will take around 6 hours granting no delay so I opted to take the next bus. I arrived at the port of Dumaguete around 12 noon.

The uncovered path walk going to the ticket booth of the fast craft is some distance away. I treaded the grueling, hot, cemented walk way sweating profusely that I felt its cascade. As I stood near the area, I had a glimpse of a clique of Koreans talking. From the tone and pace of their speaking, somehow, I knew something is not right. Then I saw the notice printed in short bond paper, “All trips are cancelled”. What a day I said! I waited. I wanted to know why. I took a seat nearby when a staff went out. From my distance I overheard him saying, “The waves are too unruly to sail safely”.

I would have resolved to stay until 11pm and take the boat going to Cebu when my Chemistry professor called my name. I knew she’s going to my destination too so I immediately broke the news to her. She was furious! When I saw the porter behind her carrying 2 squarely huge bags, I nodded to her emotion. Then we discussed how to go about the unfortunate events that happened.

We decided to travel by bus, take the roll on-roll off barge, to be able to cross the next island, Cebu. As we sail, the waves became fierce. The further we sail, the stronger they became. I lost my equilibrium. My professor who’s beside me became my stress ball. Thanks to her. She didn’t complain. My two hands were already robustly clasped to my seat with my butt almost hanging in an effort to balance the barge when it tilted to some angle. I admit, I am paranoid in life-threatening situations. I don’t think I am ready. But we made it. Thank God!

We went inside the bus again and started again my long journey to my destination. Along the way I could feel the warmth of the occasion. I could see busy people preoccupied in their preparation. There were already disco lights and sounds stationed outside people’s houses. There were explosions of firecrackers near and far. I saw people in long queue to order “lechon manok”. I heard beautiful Christmas Songs sang by the choir in churches which made me sing along until their voices fade in the air. It was quite a long trip, four hours to be more exact.

We arrived at the Cebu South Bus terminal, and immediately rode a cab to take us to Pier 3. Then the string of unfortunate events still hanged on us. There was no boat available. We tried our luck once more and proceeded to Pier 1. There I found some consolation. There was a trip going to my place of destination. It was my teacher who’s got the dilemma. Her boat was in Pier 7. She said she can manage so I just called another cab to take her to the boat. I kissed her goodbye and greeted her Merry Christmas.

With my three bags, I was alone, as I went inside the boat at 10:00 in the evening. I looked around trying to find a soul whom I know. There was none. I proceeded to my bed, laid down my bags. Then I closed my eyes and slept. At 25, ‘twas Christmas at the Sea.

My Environment and I

My environment, physical that is, is an extension of myself. Matter-of-factly, it forms an integral part of my whole being. In sociology, we have learned that the environment plays an unimpeachable role in the development of an individual. Thus we aptly say, we are a reflection of the environment where we grow up. We cannot desert ourselves from our environment. To put simply, it is inalienable.

Sadly, if we look around us our environment has drastically changed.

Our forests are wantonly depleted. Our supply of potable water has increasingly become limited. Our air has become a worldwide carrier of innumerable pollutants. Our land, year after year, seemingly becomes smaller in size. Temperature has gone extreme. If it’s daytime, it’s literally hot. If at dawn, the cold seems unbearable.

There adverse changes in the environment are quite alarming that they need immediate solutions. At the moment, I cannot just play being blind in the middle of all these unscrupulous destruction. Knowing for a fact that the growth and development of the future generation also depends on the quality of the environment that they live, I’d say, the time to save the environment is now.

The status quo reveals a lot of realities that must be acted urgently. It must turn a regular Filipino into a Filipino environmental advocate. And the key is to be aware! That way, we will realize that the way of the Earth is towards annihilation. Could it be that we will now build the modern Noah’s Ark. God forbid!

Few months ago, I empathized to families with family members who mercilessly passed away and the thousands of survivors who are still in pain on their road to recovery caused by the typhoon Ondoy and Pepeng. Most were all caught unaware. No one was prepared. We thought it would not create a really massive destruction. We were all surprised when water seemed to rise unceasingly. The last thing we knew. Houses were swallowed by the hungry water. Lives were taken. Properties were destroyed.

The other side of the story however knocked all our heads to boldly face the offshoots of our being unconcerned. It made me realize how over the past years, we have unrelentingly altered the beautiful creation of God. It made me aware that our environment unknowingly turned to a wasteland because of our apathy and indifference. It made me think that indeed, not only humans are vulnerable, so does the environment. From the perspective of the insurance companies, these are acts of God, but the truth is, these are acts of man, traceable to his insatiable greed. Our environment should matter and that battle cry should be carried in everyone’s sleeve. Now, that our environment, from being stable to being vulnerable; everyone must be counted to help bring back the equilibrium of our sustainable ecosystem.

The environment at the moment is in dire state. It cries for help. It longs for a hand that cares. It needs you!

My Love Language

This is not just about romantic love. This is about expressing and receiving love in a general viewpoint. I mean relationship of all sorts. Romance. Work. Friendship. Family.

For the intense love of toastmasters, which I refer to as addiction in my previous articles, three constipated human psyche convened to share their common interest. Discussing things, over a cup of coffee. Table topics with sense and a little nonsense to be more accurate. The topic? Our common denominator! Oh well, we piled up a truckload of common sentiments but at least we have not gone sentimental over the issue.

Along the highway of a kilometric conversation, we met in a three-way-crossroad. Emmylou, Jabez, and myself share the love of books and the passion for reading. And off sprouted the dogged idea of putting up a book club in Bacolod. Eagerness filled us all. The moment can be described as magnanimously magnificent.

The first book, Don’t Throw Away Tomorrow, unfortunately is not available in bookstores. We acquiesced that this is beyond our scope so we let go of the first book. So it seemed a not-so-nice jump-off. We settled for the second suggestion, The Five Love Languages of Love for Singles by Gary Chapman. Though at this point, we have not yet met to discuss the book, I am now writing my thoughts.

According to the author, Dr. Gary Chapman, there are 5 love languages. These are Words of affirmation, Quality time, Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. Worth noting though is that, one person may be bilingual, meaning to say, he speaks/shows two of the aforementioned languages.

I already have some inkling that my love language is words of affirmation. And yes it is after reading and confirmed after taking the profile test at the end. It really did not catch me by surprise. Ever since I knew that for me, “The tongue has the power of life and death”.

For an unknown reason, I take words so seriously. Written or Spoken. It will take me sometime to get over the hurts that are derived from the poignant words cast to me. Most of my friends say, don’t mind. But I don’t have the power not to. Unsurprisingly, it takes ten positive words to forget one negative word, according to a study.

I have a need for people to affirm to me. They say the greatest criticism is the lack of reaction. Moreover, they say, if you don’t have anything nice to say, shut up. But this is not what I mean. Words can be played skilfully like keys in the piano to make it sound better and suit our hungry ego. It’s not the words! It’s the manner of saying it! This is a daunting task, if I may appeal, as it takes a lot of introspection and a lot of practice too. I am not spared, I admit. More often than not, the dictates of our heart prevails over the mind. As such many relationships falter.

Thus, I have learned that being a social being in the midst of other social beings, being nice does not hurt.

As I leaf through the last page of this book, may I always be reminded that everything in this world is fleeting except for one – how well I have established relationships with people around me.

Judgment!

When DTM Ro Leonora sent me a text message about having to judge in an impromtu speaking contest sponsored by the Rotary, I was surprised, pleasantly surprised that is. For some seconds I lost track of my listening to a prepared speaker whom I will evaluate in a few minutes. Of course, I said yes.

Then I realized, I am training a high school student at La Salle for a contest which as far as I know is sponsored by the same organization. So I quit the task as a trainer to give justice to the other constestants and to give integrity to the role of being a judge.

The day of the contest came. I did not see my mentee. There I came to know that he belongs to a different zone. I was utterly vindicated.

There were six contestants and the reveleation - which does not really caught us by surprise, all were ladies. Where are the gentlemen?

Well, at least one of the judges is and of course, the Chair, Boy Gequillana plus the master of ceremony whom is also a Sillimanian and and a debater (according to his introduction), including the two timers.

The timers. They are quire amusing, at least to me. I always remember street ice cream vendor passing by whenever, the four minutes is up. To the contestants, they might be a distraction. To some, a mental relief because finally they can stop groping for words. In toastmasters, since we are very time conscious or at the very least is conscious that we are timed (though at some point we ignore the red light because of some irrepressible hightened emotions), we use a timing device with green, amber, and red lights. No sound to signal the time as it will appear very disrespectful and rude to some extent.

The contestants. Some are promising speakers. Some needs a little polishing. Some are just there. Now I am rude again. At least i recognized I am. Some already are rude but hintless that they are. Most of them started in a pageantry manner like, "my question runs this way". On the fifth contestant who said that phrase, I am already on the brink of suffering nausea. I would have appreciated if they immediately read the question as it is. Moreover, it is quite obvious and evident that the contestants have memorized their opening statements. They flawslessly quoted famous peace giants like Mandela and Mother Teresa. I dont have a problem with that. The danger to that is the transition, from the opening to the body of their speech. Some into's do not connect at all to the body of the speech. It's a little aweful and disturbing to some extent.

An excellent speaker must have a balance of the two elements of effective public speaking.

One, is the skillful and intelligent analysis of the topic. We translate it as the "substance" in the score sheet. The very reason why a speaker exists is because he has a purpose of speaking in front of an audience. The audience does not deserve anything less. The speaker should at all times be guided with that purpose. I believe, the measure of how effective a speaker is, is when the audience, at the end of the speech is one heart and one mind with the speaker. That means, the message is effectively being put across.

Second is the media/tools by which the speaker used to speak with purpose. One is the voice. A speaker must know the quality of his voice. Employ vocal variety, as when you are excited, depressed, ecstatic, in love, angry. Second is the eye contact. This part is meant to establish a connection to your audience and to appear very earnest and sincere. Looking at them in the eyes means they belong. Third is the use of body language. "Action speaks louder than words". They convey more meaning to your words. They put more emphasis on your points, one by one.

At the end of the day, public speaking is a skill. It's only requirement is practice!

I Wish I Were...

When life becomes too deplorable…When I cannot cope with the busyness of it…When I cannot comprehend its web-like complexity…When I cannot fathom the depth of the human psyche…When I loose the understanding between commitment and time-table…When I can’t seem to find myself…When I felt restless in the silence of the night...When life is like traveling in a sea of banality…When life’s a bitch and crap…

I wish I were a fisher folk and only think of making a catch. City dwellers will envy the freshness of the air…the greenery surroundings…the white-sand beach…the playful waves…the simple life.

I wish I were a farmer. When I am thirsty, I can have coconut water. When I’m hungry I can pick bananas from the trunk. When I’m tired, I can sleep under the shade of the tall tress. Life is simpler.

I wish I have the power to simplify. Anyone?

No Copying Please!

The big round eyes of my Grade 4 teacher have the resolute power to make us focus on our own paper during daily quizzes and long exams. She would roam around the four walls of the classroom with her elongated brown stick as she executes careful, calculated steps following a certain rhythm. Not one of my classmates would dare to move his head sideward as that is tantamount to peeking someone else’s answer. The only allowed movement of the head is moving it up and down. When she feels suspicious, she would blurt out in a firm deafening voice, “No copying please”. With that, even moving the head up and down, is a mortal sin.

Yes, copying is taboo when we are inside the portals of the academe. And after being away from that institution, I realized that copying is not that atrocious after all.

I watched ASAP yesterday and saw Nina in tears after she was conferred the Diamond Platinum award or ten time Platinum reaching a total sales of 200,000 copies of her album Nina Live. I can’t blame her for being melodramatic. Her tears are not part of a script. Indeed, it was very monumental as she is the first Filipina to receive the feat after Jose Marie Chan. But its is public knowledge that Nina Live contains all revival tracks including popular hits like, Love moves in mysterious ways, Through the Fire, Burn, among others. You see, copying can give you a Diamond Record Award. Not bad after all.

When you plan to open your own business, franchising is the “in” thing. A colleague at work bought a Smokey’s franchise which makes business for him a lot easier. The brand name is already established so business is just a breeze. One will just buy the brand or to put simply, one will just copy the brand, and he will make money out of it. Copying is not bad after all.

Soap opera in television is not spared from copying too. Lovers in Paris, Pinoy Big Brother, Survivor, Stairway to Heaven, and many others are not created by Filipinos. And yet, Pinoys patronize them. To some extent, adaptations even rate higher than the original stories. Copying is not bad after all.

To copy is to make work easier. Does this mean, the modern human psyche is degenerating? Does this mean that creativity is passé. Does this mean that society does not anymore put premium on hard work, industry, and ingenuity?

No copying please!

OUTPOUR of the Heart

I felt restless because of the words that i said. But deep inside me are words telling me that it was just an outpouring of my heart. I felt it was already too heavy to carry and it reached the brim of my emotional reservoir.

I had a serious talk with Sheila two weeks ago. Her words lingered until now, Jay you cannot do it alone. You are not the club. She was right. Sometimes, the best option is to say no, even if it means not following the dictates of your passion. Sometimes i thought of quitting. But no. It's against my will. I know the feeling is just fleeting. I will be back. I may detest it at the moment but I will find my way to it the soonest time. As I have said, I developed an addiction to it. So I had to cling to my passion! That's how i love toastmasters! It shed some light to me the dictum that says "we are happy when we are most miserable".

After one of our meetings, i had the luxury of a comfy ride with Jaclyn. She told me, time will come that its not fun anymore. Instead of being "destressed", its adds up to your daily stress. Am I near to it? I hope not.

Sometimes, i am grateful. Why? Because it moves me to write. Writing becomes my scheme for unloading the toxic contents of my heart. It is in the restlessness of my heart that i get to let it out and be renewed.

When will this last?